TOP TEN REASONS I'M BETTER THAN YOU

Greetings and Salutations to all of you who are NOT ME. It's good to be ME... and NOT YOU.

NOTE: You may or may not see the picture here. As wonderful as I am, I can't figure out why sometimes my pictures appear and sometimes they don't.

WARNING: This Rambling is written with tongue placed firmly in my cheek... because I DON'T think I AM better than you...but I see so many people who think that they ARE better than YOU...so I thought...that since I AM better than THEM...that I would point MY finger at THEM to protect and defend YOU.

With that said...here are THE TOP TEN REASONS THAT i AM BETTER THAN YOU.

#10 It is a scientific fact that within my gray matter...the electrical synapses are so charged with electricity and spark...that my mind could power an entire city. No...really!

#9 Someone once asked me..."You don't think that your fecal matter stinks?" My answer to them..."No...it doesn't. Mine smells like a field of wild flowers."

#8 I am edumacated.

#7 When the good Lord was passing out books...I told Him I am smart enough...give me looks...and the rest is history.

#6 I am so theologically correct...that you could bind the Ruminator Ramblings in leather...gold line the pages...and call it BIBLE PART TWO...aka N.R.V. (New Rodney Version)

#5 There is no need for you to read the Bible...I will tell you what to think, feel, say, and how to act to line up with my perception of how Christianity SHOULD be.

#4 I don't smoke, drink, chew, cuss, fuss, do drugs, smoke, gossip, wear my hair to long, wear saggy pants to reveal my butt crack (just say no to crack), (fill in the blank with anything that YOU DO).

#3 I DO pray in public, give money to the needy, attend church on a regular basis, attend Sunday School (especially the Ruminator Sunday School Class), sing as loudly as I can to drown you out, give tithes and offerings, (fill in the blank with any religious thing that YOU DON'T DO).

#2 The next time you need a standard, guideline, or a calibration point to gauge your life by... call 1-800-Rodney. If you get a busy signal...call again and realize...I am in big demand.

and the #1 reason that I'm better than you...

#1 IT'S ALL ABOUT ME BABY...IT'S ALL ABOUT ME

BONUS REASON

Why do you think people warm up their voices for singing by saying ME ME ME? Because they are thinking about ME, ME, ME.

FINAL THOUGHTS...FINALLY

Well there ya go. Of course...It's ALL ABOUT HIM BABY...ALL ABOUT HIM...and not me.

Love and Humble Kisses
rodney "it's all about JESUS" boyd